Day 68 : Art is everywhere you see , just need to keep your eyes open

March 18, 2018
Beautiful memories, they come to me silently when I sit down thinking about you All those times I looked at you and every time, yes every time I fell for you It felt  like September, everyday beautiful skies like your eyes I wish I could swallow all my fears and set them all free But all I feared was losing you after you knew what I was A messed up broken  story 

I know I really know, it was not you It was me all the time I agree
all those bridges that connected my world to yours , I have burned them down into ashes  All those little things that remind me of you , I have silently learned to deal with them. But The only one thing that remains is this undefined feeling , I can't explain and deal with ....

Love ... lost but never found 
Someday, I wish I could see you again I wish all my fears weren’t pulling me I wish I could scream and tell you what you really mean.

Like the clicks , do let me Know .
The following were clicked at various hotel  venues including #GrandHyatt #HolidayIn…

Day :67 : I have lost hope

March 17, 2018
Maybe I am a bad person, unknowingly who hurts people and is a selfish person.Maybe I don't deserve happiness nor anything what i really wish to .Maybe this is supposed to be a punishemnet for all my bad karma .I guess ill have to deal or rather just give up .I already have .There is no silver linning , there is fucking anyone waiting for you , nothing its all bullshit .All these glamourous ideas are fake in itself , may be its true for others it is actually, not for me . 
I wish nothing actually, I mean I have no goals, nothing ... its empty hence on ..  . .My life sucks right now big times, i don't know may be its supoosed to be this way , me sulking around , just seeing happiness all around but i seriously dont know how to take it in , may be i am lost forever . 
No seriously ive given up , no hopes , no goals , nothing , i am just lost , i dont want to be found . . #dailydiaries#newyear2018#motivationalmondays#dailywritings#articon#artistsogoa #goa#art#photography#a…

Day 65-66 : Sometimes all i do is sit and sulk

March 15-16 
The biggest mistake we do is think that we are the only one suffering and the rest of the world is far away from all the problems and everyone is enjoying and having the time of their life . Well for the fact I used to do it to , but then a new way to approaching to this problem is comparing your problem to the rest of the bigger problems people are dealing with , more severe , more critical and then analyse how small your problem is .Not all problems may have solutions , sometimes the solution could just be dealing with the problem itself .

#dailydiaries#newyear2018#motivationalmondays#dailywritings#articon#artistsogoa #goa#art#photography#abstract#depression#thoughts #friday

Day 62 - 64 : I realeased my first voiceover , go check it out

March 12-14
Well there wasnt much happening apart from me running around like a lunatic always in problems apart from that i did a instant video , just some thoughts came to my mind like lines of a verse so i put it in a video , go check it out .... And let me know if you like it link is below 
Shit, i don't get this feeling sometimes, its a really mixed one like some uneasiness, what is it ... 
IS it going to be like this always , i know i am not supposed to fasten this process of life but i am just loosing it , will i ever get to do the things which i seriously want to , i am scared , i have no hopes like anymore . just that i have lost i guess on life . 

#dailydiaries#newyear2018#motivationalmondays#dailywritings#articon#artistsogoa #goa#art#photography#abstract#depression#thoughts

Day 61 : Its like an unending trap of miseries

11 March 2018

Its like these problems aren't ending , I literally was into tears yesterday , I don't really know why in specific, I am losing it ..  I don't know where I am going , where is this whole thing going , I loosing it , everything ,  I don't know what the fuck is going on , this is some serious shit happening , nothing is right , The motivational  videos I watch are all crap , real  shit in life is torture . All the things I want to do is turning upside down .
Is it supposed to be this way , can just any one sort of the things for me one by one , may be I am a mess its supposed to be this way ... I am not happy , this is not me .

More than sad , I am scared as fuck if am I going to survive this shit , am I going to be stillexisting .... I miss or I haven't really felt how fun feels like . why is it like this way , why cant I be that person I want to be , carefree , doing what she likes , leaving on her own terms ,  caring less about people who are ungrat…

Day 60 : Some self realisations

March 10 , 2018 

Love is like that moment when someone goes out of the way to be good to you or just does things that will make you happy . I have seen it once like experienced it .. I felt it actually don't know about the other side . 
Idk  what's up , seriously I don't know May be I am a really bad person who doesn't deserve any kind of emotional , mental happiness .. May be I'll continue to suck this way .. I deserve all this ... I see people happy and be jealous  to the core seriously , I ain't joking , I am serious , one moment I promise myself no I won't invest time in the things I know is useless ... When will that day come when finally I will get to live the way I want to , it's like I am just not where I want to be , I am lossing it totally .  

Day 59 : A wandering mind is more than just puzzled

March 9 , 2018 
I don't really know where I am headed , do you always have to know , yes it scares the shit out of me sometimes oh ! sorry almost all the time, its like I am bound under the spell it looks like, is my life supposed to be this way , just this, I know now you will say all those lines from some quote or youtube videos , I do the same thing dawg i hunt for all possible motivational stuff later just to get back on track . I don't know where i am going to ,i just hope universe you have planned something awesome for me . 

My little goals yes i have in a way completed them, but i am waiting what you have planned for me , is it going to be exciting  ,like full of thril , i have this one very , every moment i kinda think of it ,yes i want it to come true , i aint going to tell what it is as it might never come true , but i so wish it, and if by now you thought its that love nonsense then believe it is no where close to it . 

Just pray it comes true sooner so I can tell you …